Today, I was supposed to light 5 candles on your chocolate cake. You would look at me with a face full of frosting as your family and friends sang of another year older. That celebration of your life will never be made and instead, I light the candles of remembrance of a life taken away too soon.
The toys and the presents will remain unopened and the joyful cries of my son will never be heard. We will remember your laughter as a joyful memory that made everyone smile and recall the days of their own youth.
Why has the world chosen to move forward when the seconds of my life pass slowly without you by my side? I long for the moments of not having a minute to myself, of replacing batteries in your tank engines, making sure bubbles were added to your bath, and chocolate was added to your milk. I miss those moments when you would snuggle with me and tell me you love me. I would give my life to just see you run around the house breaking shit for just one day more.
Now the only thing that is left broken is my heart and without you, it will remain that way.
Happy Birthday to my son in Heaven. Mama loves you.
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Johnathan's Journey 